Why am I in therapy? Nothing so horrific happened to me. By Joanna page 2

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4,090 Responses to Why am I in therapy? Nothing so horrific happened to me. By Joanna page 2

  1. Sylvia says:

    Where is everyone??

  2. Hi Sylvia, Maybe others are having the same problem. This might help, I was finally able to get on myself! Gretch

  3. Larry says:

    We are still on page 1 Sylvia. Catching up.

  4. Jack Waddington says:

    I managed with the help of my Jombo to get page 2 to be my current page … yippee!!!! cos I thought I might be losing my mind. Things getting a bit dodgy and not sure if it’s me OR Trump.

    I suspect it’s me cos I don’t think Trump is a “full shilling” as the used to say in the nick of the woods, I was ‘dragged’ up in.

    Jack

    • erlt83 says:

      Re: your Trump remark, Jack. … ,or a brick shy of a full load, or lights on but no one home. This page does really crazy things; bumps me, changes posts……. turns maroon… cheers , Jack.
      dave h

      • jackwaddington says:

        Dave: the one, a nephew of mine used was ” not a full shilling”.
        I suppose it shouldn’t really care what Trump is doing to himself, his party, or for that matter, his country since it’s not mine, nor do I reside there anymore … BUT there’s this little thing buzzing around in my head that he’s actually appealing to a lot of people and that is the most disturbing factor for me.

        Maybe I’m just jealous or envious … but I can’t get it out of my head that the 2016 election did not give the presidency to the winner of the election, but gave it over to 540 Electoral Collage members to select who should occupy the White House.
        All that reveals to me is that the United States of America is NOT a DEMOCRATIC country when it comes to selecting a president. I can see why the F.F. made it so, since had they not done so, a Union of states might never have happened. Each governor (who, incidentally at that time, was selected by Westminster), needed to feel they still had some autonomy. Trouble is:- it seems having created it; it’s not possible to get rid of it. But that applies equally to many other things we humans create.

        Jack

  5. Margaret says:

    Subscribing

  6. Renee says:

    Recently I’ve been thinking about how easy it is to have strong negative feelings when reading Patrick’s posts where he repeats the same dehumanizing, derogatory and stereotyping narrative of the Jews as the ‘problem’ people. (Much like he was/is seen as the ‘problem’ child in his/our family.) After thinking more about Edward Said’s view about the prevalence of us in Western/dominant cultures doing a similar thing to other cultures/peoples, I have started thinking this tendency might be more prevalent and ‘normal’ than we would like to think. As much as it is almost automatic to want to condemn Patrick, I think it is much harder to see how we might be doing this ourselves, inadvertently. Besides Trevor Noah, who brilliantly pointed this out with his joke, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k-nafiUG6j8&t=27s (which I posted once before) , Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie does an incredible job (IMO) of pointing this out in her TED talk, “The danger of the single story”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D9Ihs241zeg&t=212s (listen for the line, “It’s such a shame that young Americans are serial murderers…….good stuff!)

    • Sylvia says:

      I’ve seen where there is more of a push in asking for aid to under privileged countries to show more dignity of the people and less pity. They want a say in what ads are shown. They don’t want such down-trodden looks on their faces. Of course when starvation scenes of children in war-torn Yemen on the news, no ads are needed, their dire needs are obvious–stop bombing and let the humanitarian efforts through.

      We might feel pity for the African countries, and not have a grasp of what day to day life is about besides the poverty. But we don’t hate those countries. We don’t see them as a power-threat. But Jews, the government, those who we think screw us out of what’s rightfully ours–whether they do or not in reality, they become the focus of hatred. And usually that hatred is born far before we even have a concept of ideas or adult thinking. That hatred of presumed power from the skinheads, the fanatics, et al, is merely a plug in to conduct the energy already stored. It’s a hatred of resonance. How’s that…

      • Renee says:

        Sylvia, I appreciate you pointing out that I did not say anything about the differences between Patrick’s beliefs about the Jews, and our tendency in Western countries to dehumanize and have only ‘one story’ of groups other than our own. I only pointed out what I saw as a similarity. Which, I think, ends up weakening rather than strengthening my argument. So I’m glad you mentioned that. I wanted to add that critiques of traditional white, Western views do not just come from people from so-called ‘third world’ countries. They come from within our countries too. This is an example: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DwIx3KQer54&t=3s. (Deconstructing white privilege.) I guarantee it will be thought-provoking. This actually did blow my mind! See if it does something similar to your mind.

        • Sylvia says:

          Renee, I can see how as a society we have continued our unconscious racism. Maybe we only really see it in the Archie Bunkers and others when it is overt. I wonder too, how much of it is tribalism, and somehow innate. I suppose there’s always the wanting to keep things status quo and seeing differences as a threat to that. I’m thinking our society may not be the only ones to be guilty.

          I recall during the Vietnam war, that babies born half Vietnamese and half American were looked down upon as being impure. Guess we aren’t as well-liked in other countries as we thought.

          I think the integration of children of different ethnic cultures may be the only way to make things right. Children have the capacity to not judge. My nephews and niece grew up in a diverse school system and are married to non-Caucasian spouses. I think it has to start early to make headway–like the old saying, ‘you can’t teach old dogs new tricks’ , maybe I would add: ‘unless they have gotten rid of their hang-ups and hatred and hurts through therapy, and don’t feel a need to project them onto others.’

          • Larry says:

            Sylvia, maybe in some happy future people will all be light brown with slightly slanty eyes.

            • Sylvia says:

              Larry, maybe some day….

              • Patrick says:

                Oh maybe one day white genocide will be complete! Oh Happy Day! It’s amazing how people welcome their own destruction. Then our ‘masters’ (you can guess who they are) can really rule over us a mulatto, mixed up mess with no history, no culture no nothing…………..well maybe McDonalds. What a great future to look forward to………….

                • FRED says:

                  It’s hard enough I know just to FEEL your own pain. We’re all in the same boat, the Good Ship Planet Earth.

        • erlt83 says:

          While living in LA I men an Israeli Jew through work. He was rather pro Palestine. One of the stories he told me was how his grandparents and parents told him and his sibs how Arab Palestinians welcomed them to their homeland. Then one morning they woke and discovered that the entire population had moved out during the night and how later some non entitled foreigners appeared claiming rights to the lands. He said they were told that those foreigners were suspected to have killed the Palestinians. He claimed that this fantasy was very popular when he was a child. Only after moving from the Middle East did he learn the truth of how the Israeli, ” homeland,” get created and why certain allies are so adapted to accepting Israeli atrocities. Almost as entertaining a story as the christian bible. best thoughts , david h

    • Jack Waddington says:

      Renee: It’s always a tricky problem when we read or hear another person saying things and having opinions about matters that we ourselves don’t share.
      What is hardest is to allow them to have their opinions, views and ideas and let them be.

      I rarely now, more recently, due to some insights I have been having,, find someones opinions, views or idea to be offensive. If I do I need to look into myself as to why I’m offended.

      There is a caveat I apply for myself and that is if they act upon those opinions, views, or idea, that are harmful to me, then I sure need to do whatever I can to protect myself. I do not always succeed.

      Jack

  7. Renee says:

    Sorry, here is the link for Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D9Ihs241zeg. It starts at the beginning. I think even those of you with short attention spans will find it interesting:)

  8. Are you saying that Patrick is a “ victim “ of the single story Renee ? Therefor any “ negative” reactions are unfounded? If not then I’m not clear how this connects to Patrick. I also wonder if there isn’t a message about good and bad reactions or feelings. I think people can have both positive and negative feelings, some of those feelings might be old and some are firmly rooted in the here and now. They are all valuable. I worry a little that we have all been sold a story. Parents for generations have told their children “ Don’t get angry, don’t be negative” well, I say why not ? Those feelings and reactions are as important as any other. Gretchen

    • Jack Waddington says:

      Gretchen: that is precisely what I prefer never to use that word “negative … or ‘positive’ for that matter unless I’m talking mathematically.

      It automatically connotes BAD.

      Jack

  9. David and Jack, First, Thanks Jack for what you wrote about growing up gay. It really was very interesting. David , I thought your question to Jack was thought provoking. The story about painting the house pink was just that …a story but it is a great story and might have been a pretty good strategy at the time. I think Jack knows that I disagree with him about Homosexuality and in fact I disagreed with Art, and told him so, from the very beginning. That being said it was a different day and age. As you may or may not know Homosexuality was listed in the DSM as a mental illness until the 70’s. Even after it was removed I believe there were many clamoring to have it put back in. Gretchen

    • Jack Waddington says:

      Gretchen: Hey!! that has made my day acknowledging my story about my “gaynesss’, it being first thing in the morning for me.. Not sure I remember you disagreeing with me.

      One other thing is that we call our selves being Gay. There was nothing ever gay (joyful) about our sexual orientation. Even now, when I am at my most contented with my state of being … to characterize it Gay I always thought was a bit off, though I do use the word.

      I believe it has it roots with Oscar Wilde and established when Ivor Novdello (an English musical writer in the 40’s and 50’s consolidated the word in his Musical “Gay is the Word”.

      Jack

    • Jack Waddington says:

      Gretchen: Hey!! thanks for that. It’s made my day acknowledging me/it, being first thing in the morning for me.. Not sure I remember you disagreeing with me.

      One other thing about us calling ourselves Gay. There was nothing ever gay (joyful) about our sexual orientation. Even now, when I am at my most contented with my state of being … to characterize it Gay I always thought was a bit kinda off, though I do use the word.

      I believe it has it roots with Oscar Wilde and established when Ivor Novdello (an English musical writer) in the 40’s and 50’s consolidated the word in his Musical “Gay is the Word”.

      Jack

    • FRED says:

      Love is love, regardless of “form” it may take. For me is far far more preferable to be in an heterosexual relationship but Ole Art DID say “homosexuality if no a-historical”, if you will. I do think that in almost all homosexual relationships, one person is “subconsciously